The delivery guys from the Brick who were bringing us our new washing machine called bright and early this morning, prompting me to clean up the basement and move the old washer out of the way. Meanwhile Bailey the cat was getting in the way at every turn. She’s not generally allowed in the back room unless we’re letting her go outside (because the backroom is full of loosely stacked and dangerous items, and lots of cozy dark places where a cat can hide, or die and start stinking up the place), and she knows she’s not supposed to be there (any loud noise will send her running because she knows she’s being bad), but she will take any opportunity to dart out into the backroom (and if possible, outside), so it was a constant battle keeping the kitty out of my working space and actually getting the cleaning done (I could have just closed the door, but I had put too much clutter in the way to get at it.
After arranging everything it was time to play the waiting game (I keep reminding myself that I need to get me some Hungry Hungry Hippos, or at least Ker-plunk, because the waiting game sucks). So, to amuse me in the interum I did some remote connecting to work (oh goody, another quiet day) and let Girbunny out for a run. While he was out he wound up cornering Baileycat, so she took a swat at him. Emma witnessed the event and gave Bails a good swat on the heiney. A pain in the ass for a pain in the ass. Girbuns was okay, a little shaken up though(more from Emma yelling at the cat than the actual swat). Then the cat threw up its breakfast.
Yummm.
And then she managed to get back into the backroom despite the many obstacles in the way. And then the delivery guys showed up, with the bunny running loose and the cat hiding at the back door, fixin’ to get outside at the slightest opportunity.
I didn’t have time to scuttle the bunny back in his cage before I ran down the stairs, but I did manage to locate the cat crouched behind some things at the back door and scoot her back inside.
The delivery went smoothly, the guys had already removed the washer from the box so all that was left was to remove the securing bolts (that hold the drum in place) and remove the tape and start leveling it up.
I grabbed my tools out of the closet leaving the door ajar slightly, forgetting that that basement closet is one of Bailey’s favourite forbidden zones. It was a bitch getting the feet of the machine to level out, but eventually I got it all squared off and merely had to hook up the plumbing and all systems were Thundercats, Ho.
I went back upstairs to make sure Girbunny was okay and he had already put himself back in his hutch. What a good boy he is.
The washer is more compact than I remembered it on the display floor. I grabbed two different sized comforters, tossing the smaller one in just to see. It fit nicely, with room to spare. If I recall, it didn’t even fit in the old one. The larger comforter however is just a tad too big for the machine. I seem to recall attempting to wash it in an old full-sized Kenmore upright in my first Toronto apartment, and it fit that just as snugly (and got a little toasted in the dryer which I shouldn’t have put it into).
So that’s good news, the machine is about 50% more capacity than what we had, which is good, useful. I washed the smaller comforter, and after ten minutes hang time outside, it was almost completely dry. I plopped three pairs of jeans into the machine (which was about capacity on the old machine) and still had room for a half dozen t-shirts, some hand towels and other things.
The bad news is I thought it was bigger. But that’s not too bad, really, though the bad news is it takes about 55 minutes for a cycle from start to finish. It’s a slow, thorough machine. But things will be clean, and we’re using a hell of a lot less energy.
The ratings card that came with it has it pegged at 170 Kilowatt hours/year, which is the lowest rating for any washer I’ve seen. The American ratings system actually starts at 177 kwh/y so it’s under even the minimum usage previously rated.
As I was cleaning up the back room I realized I hadn’t seen the cat around for a while. I did a fairly thorough look around and couldn’t see her anywhere. I closed off the back room and put my tools back in the closet, the door still ajar. I took a look in there and didn’t see her, so I closed it up. Had a shower, prepped myself for work, and ate some lunch… still, no kitten. I began calling around for her but couldn’t see her in her usual sleeping spots (of which she has many). Finally I heard a cry from the basement closet, opened the door, but she was nowhere to be seen. I could hear her loud and clear, but there was no visible sign of her. Did she die? Is she a ghost now?
Then I look up.
You see, we have stairs from the main floor that go to the basement, and the closet is at the foot of those stairs. Overhead, there’s another flight of stairs that runs from the second floor to the basement. It’s been turned into a closet on the second floor and the door is essentially walled off in our basement. The stairs are open faced, meaning there’s no back part to them, so the landlord put some drywall up on the slope to block it off… but he did a rather shoddy job and there’s just enough space along the sides for, say, a cat to fit through. And so there Bailey was, stuck in the forgotten stairwell. There was a narrow space at the top of the doorway to the closet between a step and the drywall where Bailey had her head sticking through, meowing awy. She started to squeeze through but realized she had nowhere to go, and it was a tight squeeze. Her little white paws were filthy grey. I tried reaching in to pull her out but she began to freak. Aside from taking the drywall down, I didn’t know what to do.
So I tried to offer her my shoulders as a platform. It was still about a foot and a half down from the space to my shoulders so she wasn’t really sure about doing it. I tried to reassure her it would be okay, but she’s a cat, and generally can’t understand what I’m saying. After a few attempts she finally climbed down. She was really agitated and hugged my head close to her belly as she stood on my shoulders. I let her jump down onto the couch and she promplty bolted upstairs. I guess the ordeal was a bit much for her and she gakked a pool of bile, water and kibble all over the floor. I would say she learned her lesson, but, well, that damn cat is as tenacious as she is annoying as she is cute.
-fin-
31/05/2005
In stalled
29/05/2005
Different
My calves are tight… TIGHT! Sore…ish, but mostly tight. My ass is saddle sore from all the riding the past few days.
not quite
I bought a bag of the “Golden Oreo” cookies that I’ve seen advertised on tele, figuring that Mr. Christie might have finally wised up and used their old Girl Guide cookie formula in a year-round marketed cookie (Girl Guides went with Dare a couple of years ago and the cookies just havn’t been the same since). Well, I have to say, the cookies are not the old GG cookies, they’re just Oreos, same filling, same cookie, different colour. Don’t be fooled.
And I never did find those“Funilla” cookies.
Bailey, Gir… meet AJ
We’ve got yet another mouth to feed in the Kent-Hogbin household… a 2-year old guinea pig by the name of Armand Jamal. AJ comes to us by way of Emma’s sister’s family. While AJ was always well fed and his cage kept clean, the poor little pig wasn’t getting much of the busy family’s attention and reports were he was kind of depressed.
So it was decided a change of environment would do the little guy well, and Emma brought him to the local animal hostel that is our home. AJ fits in nicely with our black and white animal motif, as he’s, well, black and white.
He’s already settled in nicely. Bailey feels good about herself because she’s bigger than he is (unlike with Girbunny, whom Bails feels pretty threatened by because he’s bigger than she is).
Photos soon.ish.
28/05/2005
When the world is losing all control…
WARNING: Boring Washing Machine Purchasing Talk
It wasn’t my intention to do so, alas, it happened anyway. I was just browsing, you know. Shopping, but not to buy yet. Emma put me on the warpath to a new washing machine (not that there’s anything wrong with our old washing machine, save that it’s about a 1/2 load washer and therefore doing laundry either takes forever or is on a constant bi-daily wash-cycle), and my first task was to ensure machines used standard wall outlet plugs. I know dryers, like ovens and some fridges require that huge round plug (look at me, getting all technical), but I wasn’t sure about washers. Turns out all washer should be standard. Good news, meaning all options were open.
In deciding upon a washing machine, there are many things to think about:
-tub capacity
-top load vs. front load
-kwh/year usage (kilowatt hours per year)
-water usage
-variety of wash cycles
-warranty
-price
-manufacturer
-retailer
-sales guy
Now, tub capacity was an easy one. It had to be larger capacity than what we already got. I think looking at any current machine on the market we would find a washing machine that was a larger capacity than what we have.
Now a top load washing machine has several disadvantages from a front load washing mashine. A top load, in almost all cases, has an agitator inside, taking up valuable space for clothing, thus reducing capacity. Also, by design a top load needs to fill with water, whereas a front load only fills up about a third of the way and cycles your clothes through the water.
And I’m not sure why, but a top load will always use more energy than a front load, perhaps it requires more energy to agitate and to spin the drum. A front loader will also dry your clothes more when its drum spins, thanks to gravity (a front load can spin faster too).
The kwh/year for a top load are typically over 600 (interesting to note that the US and Canadian measures of kwh usages were different with the US rates being significantly lower). Only one Maytag topload machine utilized less than 500 kwh/y and it ran about $699 but was still a water hog. There were a bunch of toppers that were under $500 but they were all energy guzzlers. Most of the frontloaders were really light on kwh/y usage, with some as low as 209.
I wasn’t too concerned with wash cycles and I had pretty much determined that a front load was the way to go… most frontloads have a good variety in their programming. Unfortunately I had only really wanted to spend around $500 for a machine but I soon realized that wouldn’t be near enough. Even the smaller frontloads were starting at $900. I would need to shop around.
I knew by reputation that Maytag, LG, and Whirlpool are pretty much the best when it comes to these machines. Kenmore at Sears is just rebranded Whirlpool I believe, so pretty much the same quality. GE has a sketchy rep when it comes to large appliances, and there were some other more budget conscious name brands which I didn’t recognize or were not generally familiar as large appliance manufacturers (like Samsung…!?).
Most warranty are one year parts and labour with two years parts. Maytag has a limited 5 year warranty as well, and they staked their name on dependability. I basically was keeping my eye on those puppies.
My first stop was the Future Shop, where the salesman was nice, but cocky and a little desperate. I was riding everywhere on my bike so I was kinda grubby and healthy with a nice coating of sweat. He kind of looked down on me and tried to sell me on their “will not be beat” policy, which pretty much every store has. He also tried to upsell me on extended warranty and cheap delivery (”$55″ he said, “for installation and everything. Sears will charge you $100 for delivery and more for installation,” which I don’t think is true). I thanked him for his help and walked across the home reno ghetto in the Junction to Home Depot to see what they had. One thing that piqued my interest was a floor model Maytag discounted from $1299 to $850. It was a high performance top load but it didnt have an agitator, but a completely different drum. As great as it seemed I didn’t want the top-loader in the end. I was close to buying it, especially with free delivery on top, but I decided I needed to think on it over the evening, and the next day go check out Sears where J & G just got their new machine.
I biked down to the renamed Sears Centre and spent some time with their annoying sales guy. He wasn’t very friendly and didn’t know what to do with the fact that I didn’t want his help. There was another sales guy there helping another couple out and he seemed like a great guy though, full of information and good humour. The machines all seemed overpriced though, even with their “Sears days” markdowns. They were all quality but I wasn’t happy with price. And those guys don’t haggle. As meh as Sears was, the Bay was even worse. No salespeople at all, really crappy looking selection and not much in the way of front loaders. If Sears seemed overpriced, the Bay was gouging. I decided to leave downtown and venture to the Brick, a dependable Canadian furniture chain if there was one. I knew at least that those guys could haggle if need be.
It was a long bike from Sears to the Brick (Yonge and Queen to Dufferin and Dupont) with a bit of spitting rain and heavy headwind, my legs were tired but I kept on pushing it. I guess my defences were down and I was railroaded by a salesman. I let him engage me and just let him talk. Talktalktalktalktalk. He told me about their machines but qualified with “Maytag is the best, so let’s forget about these.” He took me over to the Maytag machines and I noted I was only looking at frontloaders, of which they had three or four. Only one was near my price range at $895. They were having a 7% off sale on Maytag which was a start. He also said he’d offer me the corporate rate instead of the 7% which should be cheaper. As we wandered over to his terminal, the machine rang up at $887, so I said, “$895 less 7% is much less than $887″. It seems the sticker price and the system price weren’t agreeing. So I said “Lets take that 7%, can you toss in delivery.” He couldn’t, but he chopped $20 bucks off it, so that was going somewhere. He also was upselling me on the extended Maytag warranty. “It’s a dependable machine and you probably won’t need it, but if you buy it, you get 5 years full parts and labour and right now we have a rebate so it really costs nothing.” He actually gave it to me at a discount so I’ll be getting more money back from the rebate than I paid. All things considered I figured I worked out a good enough deal and that I’m at the point in my life where I have a little comfort room with my money, so what the fuck and *bam* one grand goes bye-bye (with the rebate it’s actually a little less than $900).
So, it was an investment, both energy and water saving, so our landlord will be happy. We can sell our existing washer to anyone in an apartment looking for something compact ($200) and delivery is on Tuesday. All, I think, is good.
Teen Titans Go!
25/05/2005
RIP post number 1637
I was all set and good to go. A grand old essay about how wonderful I’m feeling today as opposed to my rather dour outlook of yesterday. I talked of such wonderful things such as ideology of Cookie Monster and the brutality of baseball on the psyche, of the wonders of matchmaking and quality programming. I would have entertained you with ribald stories of the fantastic luncheon I had, and you would have gleaned such insight into the nature of the world as I discussed the many miracles that the sunshine can perform. I was, and I shit you not, one chipper fucking happy bastard.
My work was chalk full of progress as I was finally getting a long term objective that much closer to completion. I had all the proper windows open, alt-tabbing between screens with such efficiency that I gathered a crowd to cheer me on like I havn’t experienced since that marathon of Dragon’s Lair at the bowling arcade lo those decades ago. But it all, quite literally, came crashing to a halt. And though you may not believe me that post number 1637 was chock-a-block full of things I have yet to deliver in any other post, it was a grand ol’ entry, and it will be missed.
All because of a DVD burner. Fuck you DVD, fuck you very much.
Oooooh, I can’t stay mad at you (*hugs DVD*), you’re just too damn special. Don’t ever leave me DVD, but don’t you abuse me like that. Post 1637 had feelings too you know. So powerful and wraught with intensity that everyone would weep at its joyous dictum (dictum?), but, as you know DVD, blog posts come and go every day like disposable hankies, but DVDs are sacred, like the sperm in Meaning of Life. I will keep you safe from dusty ground DVD, warmth against my bosom shall shelter you from cold, and your archnemesis, PVR, well, just know I’ll keep you two separated, like Girbunny and Baileycat.
so now that I’m pissed
Things that cheese me off
1) computer crashes
2) redundancy
3) that Chinatown stank (I think it’s durian and fishoil, but I’m not sure… it’s puketastic though)
4) that guy who leaves his cycling shorts hanging inside-out on the hook over the bench by the lockers which happens to be the perfct height for me to get a face full of ass sweat should I want to bend over and tie my shoe or access my bag. Why, man. Why.
5) Seeing coworkers in their tighty whiteys in the locker room… really, I don’t need that visual, thanks
6) that aimless feeling
7) those inane comic shop conversations that start with “you know what would be so totally cool…”. No it wouldn’t. Seriously. No.
8) ign’ance
9) redundancy
10) Darth Vader’s crappy ass scream (yes, still, and no, I’m not getting over it any time soon)
24/05/2005
Skullcap
I’m wasting my days away, each day less memorable than the next… I think the longer my hair grows the more of my brains it pulls out with it.
Fits of nothing this weekend. A few hours spent gaming, polished off some DVDs, watched some telly (the TiVo *FINALLY* righted itself), did some yard work, made a rhubarb/blueberry/cranberry cobbler and pizza, wrote a half assed review, and cleaned up some cat puke.
Yup, envy me and my glorious lifestyle. It’s approaching my birthday. I always get this way around this time.
Meh.
20/05/2005
Okay, maybe not
Revenge of the Sith is an anti-Bush movie… I can see that. Lucas says it’s an anti-Nixon movie, and the differences between the political warmongering of the two are pretty indistinguishable.
It’s an interesting dimension I didn’t think about reviewing the film. But science fiction has always had a tendency to reflect the hopes and fears for the future and diguised messages about of present-day activities, so it shouldn’t be a surprise.
My last words on Star Wars… for today at least
I intentionally stayed away from hype or anti-hype. I read little of naysayers comments and read none of the pre-reviews. I watched the trailer on-line once, and saw a grand total of two commercials on the tele (I can fast forward thanks to TiVo, the ginchiest glitch-box around). I never once visited starwars.com and I havn’t read any of the lead-in comics or novels with the exception of that one awful General Grievous cash-in I reviewed for Thor’s Comic Column last month.
I averted my eyes at the glut (already) of action figures and other merchandising, I didn’t eat Lays potato chips or drink Pepsi. I’m not even sure if it has a fast food tie-in this go around… I’m sure it does, but I’m just not aware of it. What else have I ignored? Everything. No Entertainment Tonight stories, no opening day “look at the freaks” news broadcasts, as few conversations about it as possible. You’d almost think I was going to avoid the film.
And I was, actually. I wasn’t planning on an opening night or an opening day showing, it was only the encouragement and excitement of a friend who bought tickets for me that I wound up going yesterday. I wasn’t excited to see it, and I wasn’t dreading it either. I had expectations but I hadn’t really formuated exactly what those expectations were. I wasn’t thinking about it, I was nothing it. It was a non event, until I saw it and it both lifted me up and let me down on its see-saw ride. I’m about 15 hours removed from the film now, and I’ve read other reviews (Roger Eberts is a scathing 3 1/2 star review, and Kevin Smith is a blind, faithful, cowtowing, kissass suckup fanboy … which I both understand but kind of dislike him a little more for it. Smith, actually, could have done a nicer job with the dialogue, sans dick and fart jokes though) and talked with some friends…. I’ve written my own review (see sidebar) and overall I feel angry, and yet somehow energized.
The more I think about it, the more I like the film, but not so much the film as it was, but the film in my head, where the Jedi are more stoic and speak less in words and more in action and body. In my head Anakin is blasting cutter droids off Obi Wan’s ship while at the same time these powerful Jedi are dogfighting droid fighters, instead of being removed from the battle altogether. In my head, Vader says nothing when the Emperor tells him his wife is dead, but instead collapses to his knees… only to have the Emperor to pull his puppet strings and have him rise to his side… silently. In my head Anakin and Padme have a strong connection with fewer words. In my head Mace Windu didn’t try to argue with Anakin nor scream when he cut off his arm… no, Mace Windu got angry (as Anakin, with all his power, manages to make everyone around him feel emotions) and died. In my head, I think of Yoda, the Wookies and the Clone Army having a grand battle instead of 4 minutes of screen time. In my head we see the Clone Troopers imprisoning the Wookies. In my head hints of greatness come to life.
George Lucas is a very smart man. He’s not much for writing or directing, but a very smart man. He continues to capture my imagination and I hope he continues to develop ideas, but instead hand them off to people who know how to bring that vision to life.
That said, I’m going to let the hype maching build up and destory Revenge of the Sith without me. I’ll pick my friends brains for their thoughts after they see it, but I’m not going to geek out, I’m not reading any more reviews, I’m not going to accept apologists explanations for the bad, and I won’t accept damnation for the good. I will speak of the films (all of them) as I would any other. I will see Revenge of the Sith once again in a few week’s time with one of my best friends in the whole world. He will have his own special take on ROTS and that excites me more than seeing the film again.
Star Wars Episode III: Revenge Of The Sith
d, w: George Lucas
If anything has failed in the Star Wars universe, it’s George Lucas. His vision is great, but his skills are weak. Like Anakin Skywalker, he’s whiny and greedy and stubborn, with a thirst for power while also believing that what he does is absolutely the right thing, without question.
Back in the early 80’s Lucas stepped back in his role as scriptwriter and director leaving Empire and Jedi to other hands for writing and shooting duties. He still maintained his figurehead status, acting as executive producer and guiding things along, but Empire, without his hand (just like Luke), was a masterpiece. Some were expecting Revenge of the Sith to equal Empire in it’s brilliance, and some were simply hoping. But anyone who’s seen The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones knows that Lucas has slid down a slippery slope. Never was his focus on acting, or delivery, or emoting, instead he’s too preoccupied with getting the actors in the right spot on the green screen for whatever digital monster/mechanoid they’re going to create in post.
With Ewan McGregor, Sam Jackson and Natalie Portman all delivering lines as if they’re rookie anchormen reading from a teleprompter, you can’t blame them, it’s bad direction. We’ve seen them do better, we know they can. Hayden Christiansen, yeah, he’s Al Gore wooden, but when he’s on screen with the veteran actors he actually is pretty decent. But there’s so much choppy delivery of even choppier dialogue, the blame can only be put in one place.
19/05/2005
Dear Cynics, redux
Dear Cynics,
let me express my sincerest apologies, you were right, I was wrong.
Now, I’m not a big man, but I can concede defeat. I gave Lucas the benefit of the doubt and I was wrong in that, you had him pegged all along. I’ve seen pornos with better dialogue, and John William’s should be ashamed.
I still like Star Wars, but you cynics will rightfully point a finger at Darth Vader’s “Frankenstein” moment, amongst so many other laughable-but-not-meant-to-be scenes, and mock with just cause. The horrid, horrid dialogue put into the mouths of great, good and competent actors is a crime of Uwe Boll/Paul WS Anderson proportions. This was all *barely*(hardly?) tempered by fantastic lightsabre duelling sequences and… well… the fantastic lightsabre duelling sequences.
You were right cynics. Even though I enjoyed Attack of the Clones (with a few reservations) and the Phantom Menace isn’t near the travesty everyone claims it is… Revenge of the Sith would have made a fine silent film in Fritz Lang fashion, and that’s about as nice a compliment I can give it.
And though I’m apologizing for doubting you, dear cynics, I’m not sorry I didn’t listen to you. I’ve come to my own conclusions on my own terms. I have happy memories with Star Wars and all the tinkering to the original trilogy, all the daft verbage Lucas has put down on paper since, all the commercialistic tendencies, etc. etc. can’t ruin that for me.
Am I done with Star Wars? No way man. But, jeesus, that scream of “Nooooooooo” will haunt me for the rest of my waking days.
P.S. (As a movie, it’s about 50/50 enjoyment to groan ratio, review coming soon)
Speak no evil
I’m going inside my head for the next couple of days to tinker around. I need to get a new hamster wheel. The last one spun a little too fast and killed the poor thing, and I’ve never gotten around to replacing him, so it explains the numerous brainfarts and lack of sensicalness as of late. I guess I need a new hamster too, huh?
Tonight: Episode 3
Weekend: Reading, Gaming, Reviewing, Scrubs and Black Books (thanks GAK, owe you an email)… perhaps some eating. Actif man.
In two weeks: Road trip and perhaps my return to radio (I used to make crank calls to the birthday report back in grade 8… small things amused small minds back then, and then there was my call in to RadioEscapades(?) back in the 90’s…)
In thirteen days, I’ll be 365 days away from turning 30. Ach.
18/05/2005
Screaming brains and intergalactic wars
This week in Thor’s Comic Column I dive into Bruce (Evil Dead) Campbell’s first foray at comic books with “The Man With The Screaming Brain”. It’s an adaptation of the film he stars in, coming to a theatre… sometime.
I also look back at the mini-series that was “Adam Strange”, which directly leads into the Crisis Countdown book “Rann-Thanagar War”.
Other books looked at include the latest team to take on “Superman”, the indie one-shot “Filler”, and, oy, a “Friday The 13th” comic.
Next week promises to be.. oh, about as equally exciting.
Memed again
So it comes back around, not once but twice.
Eva has passed along this meme for me to complete today, however I did this way back in February after Toast sent it to me.
GAK also, in a weird coincidence, sent it to me by email today
old version:
1. What’s the total size of music files on your computer:
2. What is the last CD you bought?
3. What is the last song you listened to before you read this post?
4. Name four songs that you listen to a lot or that mean a lot to you.
5. Which three people are you passing the baton on to and why?
new version:
Total volume of music files on my computer…
The last CD I bought was…
Song playing right now…
Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me…
People I’m passing this on to:
note the changes… I *had* followed it back further when I first got it and there were some minor changes even then (it was only three meaningful songs) but the place where Toast took it from is shut down… so I guess the chain then, by default started with him. Congrats Toast, you’re a meme starter by default. And sorry Eva, but it ends with me, mwahahahahaaaa.
Hairless update
It seems that my hair is not so much falling out as it is breaking off. Something is damaging my hair and it’s breaking off (counted 98 hairs in the shower this morning).
So I’m not going bald, I’m going brittle.
17/05/2005
Flirting Scholar
d: Lik-Chi Lee
You know how Zoolander/Dodgeball/Anchorman/Old School etc. are all dumb movies but in a funny way, just grown men and women acting in irrational and absurd manner with a sort of irreverent and nonsensical sense of humour. Tha’s Flirting Scholar, aka Tang Bohu dian Qiuxiang. The film stars Shaolin Soccer and Kung-Fu Hustle mastermind Stephen Chow as Tong Pak Foo, an extremely talented and fortunate artist and man of intellect. He’s graced with eight beutiful wives, all of whom have a passion for money and gambling and driving Tong crazy.
Tong is the leader of “the Four Scholars”, an obviously revered group of men, as they wear their best togs and stroll about town, causing women to flock and faint at the sight of them in a very Beatles fashion. Tong, obviously the Lenon of the group, is smitten with Li Gong’s character Chen Heung (and who wouldn’t be), as every time she turns, she delivers a smile that says “I love you” and the sun’s a little brighter and music start playing. Chen is a matron to the Madam of the region, so Tong, in order to win her favour gets himself hired under the Lord’s services (as he duels with another poor man for the job, one-upping one another on exactly how poor they are in a Monty Python-esque fashion).
16/05/2005
And don’t forget my general sense of malaise
I woke up with that ungodly “I didn’t drink last night so then why the hell do I feel like I’m hungover” hangover felling this morning. My clock radio was playing for roughly half an hour before I acknowledged that it was even on, and then it was still another half hour before I managed to open my eyes and get out of bed.
And then I stepped on the cat who has taken to sleeping on a discarded knit blanket that is heaped beside the bed (yes, the handknitbymyveryownGrandmother blanket is in a pile on the floor and being used by the cat, which I’m sure would send a certain author into convulsions).
**Update** Turns out the blanket is not knit but rather crochet… so no convultions were had.****
I was so tired this morning, I almost decided to leave my wallet and keys in the basement because the stairs seemed like too much effort. I nixed the routine bikeride in favour of much more lazy-friendly streetcar ride. Work provided me with ample tasks to perform, and being at near-unconsciousness I botched up and corrected more than a few.
My sister said I need a good vitamin B-complex supplement which will help to level out my energy flow. I guess my chi is all askew. But a well time charity bake sale in the basement cafe (yes, just like in grade school!) has perked me up… as has the fact that I just received confirmation my Amazon order has shipped. Scrubs Season 1 is mine!!!! I know what I’m up to this week, mwahaha.
falling way behind
reviews I’m behind on include:
DVD-Land
Fast Times At Ridgemont High
The Up Series - 7Up, 7+7, 21Up
Stander
Ray
The Straight Story
Intermission
I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead
They Might Be Giants Here Come The ABCs
Harvey Birdman: Attorney At Law Vol. 1
Space Ghost: Coast To Coast Vol. 2
music land
Doves - Some Cities
Spoon - Gimme Fiction
Caribou - The Milk Of Human Kindness
Wolf Parade - s/t
The Rogers Sisters - Three Fingers
The Planet Smashers - Unstoppable
Novaillero - Aim Right For The Holes in Their Lives
The National - Alligator
reading thingies
Red Thunder by John Varley
Wigfield by Colbert, Sedaris and the other guy
200 comics and trade paperbacks oy
To do list
not really in numerical order
1. Reviews for the above noted
2. Work on Quarter City once feedback comes in (est. June)
3. Write a short story… I have no ideas for a short story and plenty for a book, but I need to write a short story for something…
4. Watchem das Scrub-en DeeVenDies
5. Work the sweets off
6. Fix the clock on the TiVo
7. Get that f*@$#! Escrow stuff done at work. It’s pissing me off.
8. Be happy dammit.
9. search for a bigfoot at the grocers (woahohoahohoh) for Ryan, I hear he’s down by the peas and carrots
10. more shleeeeeeeeeepies
I’m making lists… my day has totally gone tarantula. (you need to add that to The Meaning of Liff Wendy)
11/05/2005
Kung-Fu Hustle
d: Stephen Chow
w: Stephen Chow, Tsang Kan Cheong
I’m a comic-book junkie. Beside my bed right now I have approximately 30 trade paperbacks and about an equal number of singles just waiting to be read (the stack only seems to grow instead of decline). Now, arguably I’ve grown out of my superhero phase, but it’s more likely I’ve just added non-superhero entertainment to my interests.
But it’s true, superheroes don’t hold the same mystique with me they once used to, the awe and wonder is pretty much gone, and I’m left with either a “cool” factor (that which makes me say “cool”) or with a damn well told story.
But Kung-Fu Hustle is a superhero story that, for it’s running time, restored my “wow factor”. Sure, it’s many things aside from a superhero story, but at its core, even more than it’s about kung-fu, it’s about good guys and bad guys who can do more than mere mortals can (they even wink at Spider-man as one character, on his deathbed, states “With great power comes great responsability.”)
Reassessing Thor
Every now and then, you might want to take a second look at something to see if your opinion has changed. Perhaps in five years I’ll watch Hitchhiker’s again and determine it wasn’t nearly as wrong as I had originally thought (not likely). With serialized entertainment, like comics or television, the building upon what’s gone on previous can serve to enhance - or detract - from your original opinion.
This week in Thor’s Comic Column I take another look at five of our choice selections from this year… Legion of Superheroes, Bigfoot, Damn Nation, Sea of Red and Black Panther. In all but one instance the series have actually improved since their first issue. Legion is a solid superhero/sci-fi title through and through. Black Panther is a little bogged down in background exposition, but the political and personal aspects of the story more that make up for it. Damn Nation took a stumble in its second issue in terms of pacing, but the third steps right back in line and is probably the best horror title on the stands. Bigfoot, despite my early reservations, has me hooked as Rob Zombie and Richard Corben is a retrofest that you can’t ignore. Finally Sea of Red sort of sinks in its second issue as the story jumps ahead a few centuries and adds a film crew to the Vampirates tale.
Also reviewed this week: Desolation Jones (new from Warren Ellis and JH Williams III), Majestic, Easy Way, New West, Voices of the Dead, Invincible, City of Tomorrow, and Batgirl.
It’s chalk full o’ fun. Go read.
Dear Cynics
Dear Cynics,
Please shut up about how much you think the next Star Wars movie is going to suck. Please shut up about how, even though you know how much it’s going to suck, you’re going to see it anyway.
Please shut up about how you’re going to lambaste and deride the film after you’ve seen it and about how even though you knew how much it was going to suck and you saw it anyway and how you so totally should have seen Miss Congeniality 2 again instead because, as a sequel you thought it certainly sucked far less..
Dear Cynics, I realize that you feel your “childhood” has been ripped to shreds, but the only one ripping it to shreds is you. Star Wars is still great fun in the eyes of an 8 year old, and those still in tune with wide-eyed innocence and I don’t think they see a damn thing wrong between the “original trilogy” and “that new shit”. If you’re not enjoying them, it’s cause you’re too damn cynical and your view on the world has twisted in the 20 years since Jedi (try and convince me that you had issues with the Ewoks , or some of the plot contrivances, or choppy effects, or wooden acting of the original trilogy when you were ten because I don’t believe you). The latest trilogy is no more flawed than the original trilogy, it’s just that you’re older now and the seams and exposed threads are so much more apparent to your bitter, cynical eyes.
So, dear Cynics, please, shut up and let the rest of us enjoy the experience. Sometimes you’ve just got to - as Ben Kenobi sagely advised- “Use, the Force, Luke. Let go of your feelings”.
09/05/2005
no play for mr. grey
up until last week I was only a little concerned about my hair. Yeah, I didn’t really like my last $40 haircut (although many many others have commented on my hair in the weeks since, all positively), but that’s only been a minor irritation.
No, it was the grey hairs, and it’s not that I’m all *that* concerned over them, as I think having those Hal Jordan/Reed Richards grey temples would be pretty cool all things considered. But no, the grey isn’t sticking to the sides of my head, they’re sprouting up all over.
Okay, not sprouting… turning. I’ve pulled out about a half dozen hairs in the past week or so that have been mostly grey, but still their natural deep brown at the base. How does that happen.. how does th pigment still stay at the base of the hair and not grow out?
But even that’s not of concern, really. It’s more an issue because the grey hairs are less weildly, harder to control. They were sticking up and out and wouldn’t stay down, so, *POINK* there they go. But it seems that one of those grey hairs was the lynchpin that held the other hairs to my head, and the rest are deciding to make a hasty retreat.
Every day I sit at my desk, head in my hands, agonizing over the latest bit of stupid that creases my forhead, and when I finally pay attention… there’s a half dozen hairs on my workspace… a few more on my shirt… and a few less on my head.
Every time I run my fingers through it, it seems a few strands come with me. This isn’t normal shedding, this is Hair Loss ™. Up until now I never really cared that much about if I had hair or not, but now that Hair Loss ™ has visited me, the man with the hirsute head, well, I’m a little dismayed. I never worried about it before because I never thought it would actually happen. I don’t wear baseball caps… why me?
What I wonder more is why couldn’t the hair fall of other parts of the body instead. It’s no secret that I have the hairiest legs on the planet… it would be nice to see my well developed cycling musculature underneath all that downy fluff. Why can’t the hair on my legs fall off instead, or chest, or even the pubic region.. what good is all that stuff anyway? It’s not like it keeps me any warmer than anyone else.
Hair is stupid. I’m still dreaming of that decontamination machine from the Andromeda Strain that zaps you and then you brush off the top layers of skin cells and all the hairs. I’d be in that thing once a week and feel all shorn and shiny like a soap opera star instead of fuzzy and furry like my old pal Grover.
06/05/2005
Drowning in sequentialness
My stack of reading materials beside my bed is ever growing, and I just can’t seem to stave off it’s constant revolumizing (yup, I made that word up), I guess I just don’t take the time to read all the stuff I have to read.
I have two books, one narrated by a sock monkey and one written by a Dick (Philip K. that is) that I started last year, got about halfway through, and never completed (and my drive to do so is almost nigh). And I’m 1/4 through John Varley’s really engaging “Red Thunder”, but since I stopped taking the streetcar in and started biking to work I’ve red no new pages in about three weeks.
Beside the bed, under a stack of laying-in-waiting graphic novels I picked up at one of the comic cons a few weekends ago (more on that soon) is “Wigfield” written by Daily Show correspondant and Harvey Birdman voice actor Stephen Colbert, with his pals Amy Sedaris and Paul Dinello. There’s also a vintage edition of “Dr. Fegg’s Nasty Book of Knowledge” by Michael Palin and Terry Jones which is going to a friend in his (much belated) birthday package, but I don’t want to send it until I’ve read it all. It is classic Pythonesque.
Oh, yes, and then there’s the legion of graphic novels that I continue to sleep on. There’s the pile, as I said, beside my bed that I picked up at a recent convention for, on average 70% off. Good stuff like Challengers of the Unknown Must Die (the venerated team of Loeb and Sale’s first outing together, the Books of Magic (to remind myself that DC once did creative things with their magical characters, and not shit like “Day of Vengeance”), Sleeper (of which I got volume 2 and 3, so I really can’t read them til I get Volume 1), and Swamp Thing vol 2 (it’s Alan Moore, it needs to be read).
But then I have a rubberwear bucket under the bed, full of other titles like Darwin Cooke’s DC Universe nostalgia “New Frontier”, classic Star Wars reprints of the wacky Marvel series (I’ve read 1 and 2, have 3, 4 and 6, missing 5 and 7… each is usually about $50 Canadian but I’ve paid under $80 so far for the 5 I have), some ultimate X-Men, and a few assorted Top Shelf books I can’t bring myself to be interested in.
And more are on the way, including trades of She Hulk, Wonder Woman, Flash, Joss Whedon XMen, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Gotham Central, Flash, and Walking Dead (zombies, oohyeah).
And I wonder why I’m not writing.. Oy. I think while I’m waiting for the delivery guy tomorrow I’ll eschew my TiVo backlog (Sesame Street and Justice League Unlimited, less their final six minutes, will have to wait) and City of Heroes (with all it’s new character design options) I’ll instead plough through some of these books.
Thor’s Comic Column has been forcing me to buy outside my normal spending habits, and luckily I have a sweet enough job that affording the additional $10 - $20 a week isn’t an issue (just means not going out for lunch a couple days is all) but I’m reading more monthlies than I have since the mid-90’s so I’m reading lots and it’s taking away from reading all the other things I’ve been wanting to read.
Someday… someday I’ll get sideswiped on my bike by a spaced-out delivery van and I’ll be laid up for a month, then… then I’ll be able to catch up.
Fan films, they hurt
Suburban Peril has been one of my favourite blog reads since Daejin relaunched it a month ago. He pointed me to Revelations, no not the religious doomsday miniseries on NBC that I should be watching since I liked the Prophecy and The Rapture so much but I’m not, no. It’s a fan made Star Wars mini-movie (40 minutes) which Daejin stated:
Clive Thompson in his latest article for Slate argues that maybe Lucas should step aside and let the fans take over. After watching this 40 minute fan film I’m inclined to agree. And it was created with a staggering budget of $20,000.00
Well I watched it, and you know what, it’s okay… it’s makers have a definite future in the film industry, making direct to video sci-fi and horror schlock starring hard-up for work former b-level celebrities like Kevin Sorbo or ex Saved By The Bell cast members. The acting is mediocre but it’s more the fault of the direction than the actors. The script is actually quite fitting with the rest of the Star Wars run, with some nice bits and some absolutely cringeworthy readings.
Visually the special effects waver from “wow, nicely done on your budget” to “hey that looks like Wing Commander for the Amiga”. Lighting is horrid, sound is horrid, soundtrack is somewhat decent and somewhat cheesefest. And then there’s hilarity-in-rubber anytime there’s an exotic alien. Yeah, for what it is, it’s okay. As far as Star Wars goes, it’s on par in story, sub-sub-sub par in everything else.
Over at chud.com The Steady Leak advises that perhaps instead of continually destroying the original trilogy that Lucas should just remake them. I’d still watch them and he’s probably right that I’d find them more satisfactory in fitting with the prequels.
An animated series and a live action series are set to start up, and I’ll be tuning in but I’m not really sure that they’re going to work for me.
Nitpicker’s Guide to the Galaxy
This review at Planet Magrathea is about as in depth an analysis of what is wrong with the Hitchhiker’s movie as you’re about to read. It’s crazy in the amount of detail this dude paid attention to (I stopped paying attention to all the awkward badness partway through, if that’s any indication of what the movie’s like), but he nails it all on the head. He plays the role of reviewer well and keeps the ranting fanboy to a bare minimum. He even points out things that were nagging me that I couldn’t vocalize.
I too wish Hitchhiker’s was a better film. But it’s not. Read this and forgetaboutit.
05/05/2005
In a prefect world
In a prefect world, if you made a spelling mistake, it would not become another word.
Also in a perfect world, everyone would have a blog. Forget what you hear about oversaturation of the interweb with millions of self-important ramblings day in and day out leaving the snobs who started it all to say “I remember when I was one of thirty people doing this and it was actually interesting, but now everyone’s doing it and I’m no longer a clever lonely basement dwelling geek, I just a regular old basement dwelling geek.” Everyone should blog.
If everyone wrote in a journal, there wouldn’t be newspapers decrying the abundance of notebook toting pencil scribblers on streetcars and in parks. No, there’d be no commentary at all. But since the internet is, in most considerations, a public space, all these blogs are likened to a million voices talking at once. The blogosphere has become the New York Stock Exchange, or the crowd at a rock concert with every individual throwing their arm up in the air trying to get celebrities to pay attention to them and give them their 18 seconds of glory.
Journaling, and by extension, blogging is healthy exercise for the mind (and the fingers). Oversaturation? Who cares, wouldn’t it be cool if you met someone at a bar and instead of saying “what’s your phone number” or “what’s your email”, you’d say “what’s your blog”?
Blogs often show a personality, and it’s not entirely representative of what someone’s actually like, but it’s more a reflection of what they’d like to be. I’d like to be a bit more cynical, and goofy, intellectual, and cool, and strange. In reality, I’m a Nice Guy, friendly and a bit shy… There are certain people that bring out the wannabe Graig, but most people just make me shy up.
But my blog, for almost three years now, has been my outlet for random thoughts, for strange ponderances, for bad spelling and some fascinating ideas. It’s been a place for me to be goofy and it’s been a place for me to be grumpy. And sometimes it seems like a chore to get the ideas out of me, but I can’t imagine not blogging, just as I couldn’t imagine not rubbing my cat’s belly when she’s doing her belly roll on the rug when I get home.
Blogs, in complete uncynicism, are great, and there should be more of them. They shouldn’t be for the shy or lonely or reserved, or famous, or political, or compusavvy or the geeky anymore. They should be for everyone.
But that’s just me.
Meanwhile…
some changes coming soon for my 3rd anniversary